ryanestrada (ryanestrada) wrote,

The UFO Hunt

This week, an interesting man came into our lives. His name is Daksha.

I was sitting, working on comics when he followed Pete (a guy who's visiting the commune this week) home. The conversation had started about the band Daksha had been in, back when he was known as Oscar Zapata. But with Daksha, the conversation does not go where you want it to go, it goes where he needs it to go. And he needs to tell everyone that he is one of the 27 chosen people, who will help lead the true believers after humanity comes to an end on December 22nd, 2012.

Being with him gets more and more surreal, as he ignores every word you say and thrusts handfuls of notebook paper at you, covered in manic scrawlings right out of a cliche Hollywood conspiracy theory movie, shows you how everything can be mathematically related to the number 27, or shows you his infected green toe that proves he was once a dragon.

Daksha had dreamed that he would meet us. He made us all disciples (I believe I was #85), and tried to commission me to translate his backpack full of scrawlings into a custom comic to act as the new Bible after the world ends.

And then, he offered to take us out the next day to show us UFOs. That was one offer that I was sure as hell not going to turn down.

We met him at around 5, and he had two other disciples, around 16 years old, with him. In order to show us the UFOs, we would have to go to a hill in Guadalupe. But it didn't even take us that long. We saw our first two UFOs on the way, right above the Office Depot.

Daksha assured us that while they looked like airplanes, they were UFOS that had transmutated into airplanes. He busted out a specially carved stick, ran into the middle of traffic, and started waving the stick while chanting in the 7 languages that he learned through astral projection.

As we watched the UFOs, he kept shouting back at us "this is the first time you have ever seen a UFO guys! You must take advantage!" We watched until the two UFOs disappeared over the horizon, but obviously we didn't have the right reaction.

Daksha seemed a little upset with us as we continued to walk to the hill. But everything changed when a phone call came. The phone didn't ring, but Daksha suddenly put it to his ear, and spoke in a loud, clear voice "WHAT? ONLY 3? REALLY? THEY'RE NOT READY?"

He put the phone back in his pocket, and turned to us. "Sorry guys, I just got a call from my friend in Sweden. The UFOs sent her a message in her dream. You two are not ready to see the UFOs."

Apparently, the UFOs were testing us with their early appearance, and we didn't have the right reaction. We were officially uninvited to the meeting of UFOs atop the hill. We were shot down by the aliens. And Sweden, who despite being neutral, had decided to take the alien's side.

Daksha turned to Pete. "You have my number, right? And my e--mail?" he then turned to me. "Have a good life" and disappeared into the sunset.

Pete and I had already blocked out our entire night for UFO hunting, so we decided to take a road trip for a bit. And while we were gone, John (who had stayed home), had a special visitor back at the apartment.

Apparently, the phone call from Sweden had given Daksha one more piece of information. That John would be alone at the apartment, and that he was the real chosen one. He hung around for a few hours, telling John more about the end of the world. He also talked about what bad vibes I had given off, being so materialistic and all. Oh, and that our cat was from Mars. He then covered my desktop in pictures of UFOs from his iPod.

He also forgot his USB cable on my desk. Which means Daksha will be back.
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